Are Your Modern Dating Standards Delusional? | Relationship Advice
Today I came across this post:
> I’ve been single for two days now and I think it’s time to get back on the saddle! I’m back with a vengeance and I know exactly what I want now.
He must be at least 6 foot tall, FIT, make 6 figures, no kids (cuz he will be too busy helping raise mine) have his own house (not apartment, HOUSE!), no side chicks and most of all he must be chocolate. Black men only! All other men don’t even waste your time! This time I will have my happy ending. I know my worth and I’m done dating brokies! I’m not asking for too much in a partner am I?
Now let’s talk.
This post is a textbook example of modern dating delusion.
Two days single.
No healing.
No reflection.
No accountability.
Straight back into the market with a shopping list, not self-awareness.
She wants a man who is:
tall
fit
rich
child-free
homeowner
loyal
emotionally available
and willing to raise another man’s kids
That is a top-tier man by every measurable metric.
Yet nowhere — not once — does she mention what she brings.
No mention of:
her fitness
her income
her emotional stability
her peace
her ability to add value
Just demands.
This is the core contradiction poisoning modern dating: Wanting a finished man
while showing up unfinished.
She disqualifies men with kids,
but expects a man with none to absorb her baggage without question.
That’s not standards.
That’s convenience masquerading as confidence.
She wants a house because she wants security without sacrifice.
She wants exclusivity from men with options while offering obligations instead of incentives.
And the loudest line of all: “I know my worth.”
People who actually know their worth don’t shout it.
They demonstrate it through discipline, self-work, and results.
High-value men don’t compete for entitlement.
They avoid chaos.
They choose peace.
Here’s the part social media won’t say:
You don’t attract what you demand.
You attract what you qualify for.
If all you bring is expectations, trauma, resentment, and a list —
don’t be shocked when the men you want never show up.
Fantasy ends where reality begins.
RULES ARE RULES.
